Sunday, October 20, 2019

Queen of the Cats 7. Piñatas

7. Piñatas

Nix laid her head upon the soft coat of Tonkinese fur and let herself be lulled by the quiet motor of the cat's purr. She reached up and scritched at his belly and the cat stretched luxuriously and promptly fell off the bed. "Oh, buddy, you ok?" Nix asked, peering over the edge of the bed. The cat blinked vacantly up at her with eyes like the ocean, so clear and blue that Nix seemed sure she could see straight through to the back of Chaucer's skull. He proceeded to hop up onto the bed and repeat the process thrice more. It was a good thing he was soft, sweet, and behind stone walls because Nix was fairly certain if she put her ear to his fuzzy head triangle, she would probably hear the ocean.

While this feat of remarkable, but hilarious, antics were repeated, the other cats in the room just stared at Chaucer in a way that seemed to intone "Have you no dignity, man?". Chaucer merrily ignored or did not notice the feline disdain being side-eyed in his direction, he just kept having fun and demanding occasional cuddles. On any average shitty post-apocalypse day, this cat could always make Nix reshape her face into something like a smile and maybe even cough out a dry laugh. Comedy in the dead lands was scarce, but Nix had all she could ever need.

It turned out that, after the apocalypse, Nix got to see more cats than she had ever hoped to and she had learned a single, startling fact: some of them just sucked at being cats. The stunning Tonkinese cat with the tiny peanut brain was gentle and loving which were great qualities before Revenant Day, but were not in a cat's favor in this not-so-brave new world. The one thing they had going for them was that they were good jumpers, insanely fast and they could climb better than any of the dead.

As a somewhat ironic aside, sometimes the dead would try to climb trees, posts, or fences after a feline. Around ten feet or so above ground, most climbs got harder and required a bit of thought. That was not a thing the dead had in spades. Sometimes it was just amazing that they could shamble down a road in their leprous horror, enough parts missing that it made many of them hard to look at. 

Once the dead reached the point of the climb where planning and care was needed, they generally peeled off like pasta and fell to the ground. Then, there was the splash. Now that most of the dead were several years post shuffling off their mortal coils, they were no longer in prime condition. In fact, it was becoming obvious that they were coming apart at the seams and losing their stuffing. The earliest of the Revenants could step in a pothole, pitch forward on the macadam and then perform their own impressions of a water balloon fight, but just once.

About a year earlier, a clump of stumbling corpses had peeled off from a road and somehow ended up outside of the Murder House and Cattery. Nix had picked up some bronchial infection and was fevered and wheezing, but something still needed to be done. When the dead congregated, they made a not-so-joyous noise somewhere between moaning and hissing. This always drew more corpses and the problem just got larger. While attempting to get herself into some protective gear, Nix had laid down for a moment and shut her eyes just for a second. When she popped awake and tried to scramble upright, she was thwarted by a coughing fit. 

Before her breathing had evened out, she caught a sudden flash of black as Nocta landed on her chest, flinging her backward onto the bed. Nix attempted to argue with the cat, then realized she was arguing with a cat and thus, probably needed a longer nap. With Nocta like a purring hot water bottle on her chest, the cat meticulously cleaned her paws, claws extended as a reminder. Nix just stopped fighting and went back to sleep. 

The next morning, Sampson woke Nix and was excited, signaling for her to follow. "Timmy better be at the bottom of a well, Lassie." Nix grumped as she followed. Sampson was leading her out to the second floor porch. Still terribly ill, Nix took a moment to gather herself, hoping that the dead had not doubled overnight while she had slept.

Nix found a sight she had not expected. It looked like a party had been held at the base of the trees lining the clearing around the block house. At the bottom of each tree, Nix spotted what looked like a bunch of thoroughly battered yet colorful pinatas. After a moment of sickness addled brain coming online, Nix realized why this was the worst party ever. To keep her from getting herself murdered while sick, the cats had taken care of the dead by running about, treeing themselves and just waiting for the dead to follow, fall, and splatter.

Turning slowly, Nix saw that most of her cats had followed her and Sampson outside. They all looked quite pleased with themselves, although some were still grooming bits of corpse from their fur. As she continued to stare, they became more pleased, accepting her silence as appreciation. Garibaldi threaded through the porch of rolling felines and dropped a hand at Nix's feet.

"Jesus." Nix croaked. Staring at the hand, Garibaldi, the pleased cats, and the festively decorative yet festering dead, Nix decided she was still far too sick to deal with the stomach-churning mess below. In a moment of pure despair, knowing how much more these corpses would decay and stink, Nix tried to calculate how many holes she would have to dig and how much dragging of the dead she would need to clean up this awful party.

As she leaned on the railing and considered, two vultures circles in and came to rest in the clearing below. They merrily hopped from corpse to corpse, picking the very best of the morsels. Nix glances up and saw the tightening circles being flown by so many buzzards that she did not try to count them. Nix kicked the hand off the porch for the arriving clean-up crew to enjoy.

Heading back inside, she refilled water dishes and refilled food bowls. She ate a can of soup, swallowed some more cold tablets and just went back to bed. A quick shower, clean pajamas and then a dive back under the covers. The cats came in as they finished their own meals and everyone settled down for an Autumn afternoon nap.

Sometimes, you just had to roll with the punches and the dead man's hands. Nature had this one and Nix let it ride.


Continue- 8. The Things We Learn

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